Is She Coming Back?
About two months ago, shortly after I started blogging, one of my favorite bloggers decided to throw in the blograg. Written by an OB/gyn in New York City, The Blog That Ate Manhattan (TBTAM) was a fun-to-read blog on medicine and food. While doing some blog-housekeeping, she inadvertantly managed to delete her entire blog! (Whoa--scarey!) When I stopped in for my regular visit, I found only her short post saying that this untoward event had occurred, and she was taking it as a sign from the celestial portion of the blogosphere that it was time for her to quit. All of her archives were gone; there was nothing left of her entire (extensive) blog except this one short post.
Some recent discussion on the blog of Doctor Anonymous about Blogaholism and the addictive nature of blogging reminded me of one of my favorite posts from TBTAM called I Love My Blog. I regretted that it was no longer available, as I was sure that Dr. A and his commenters would enjoy it, and I really wanted to read it again--now that I have been blogging long enough to appreciate her words. I did not get around to deleting TBTAM from my Bloglines, and was surprized a few days ago to see that TBTAM had a new post! I was hopeful that after a few weeks off, she decided to come back (we can't really quit, can we?). The "new" post wasn't actually new, it was the last post before the big "Oops!"; but suddenly all her archives were available again. I re-read I Love My Blog with delight. She hits a few nails right on the head.
In case this reappearance is due to a freak opening of a black hole in the blogosphere where TBTAM may again disappear to, I will reproduce I Love My Blog here, so that it will survive any such future disaster.
I Love my Blog
It’s true. I love my blog. No, you don’t get it. Yeah, I love blogging, and love reading and sharing blogs, having a blog, blah, blah. But what I mean is – I love my blog. Really love it.
Oh, all right, I’ll just say it. I am in love with my own blog. As in the I can’t wait to see you, you’re the last thing I want to see before I go to bed and the first thing I want to see when I wake up kind of love. The I can’t get enough of you love. The what did I ever do before I met you kind of love.
And the worst thing is, I can’t stop looking at my blog. Any excuse I can make –“I wonder if there are any comments?" "Did I spell that right?" "Oops – didn’t realize it was still loaded in my browser." Yeah, right. Just another excuse to look at your own blog. Read that last brilliant post just one more time. Stare in astonishment at this thing you have created. This wonderful, marvelous, one-of-a kind expression of everything you are. But not the way a parent might stare at their child sleeping like an angel in the crib. No. That would be normal.
More like Narcissus staring into the pool at his own reflection all goddamned day long. IN LOVE WITH HIMSELF. Pitiful, isn’t it?
And don’t get me started talking about my relationship with statcounter. How many hits today? Any hits since I last looked 3 minutes ago? It’s like asking everyone you know to stand around the pool and stare with you, then looking up every 2 seconds to see how many are still standing there.
Well, it has to end. And soon. I’m starting to ignore my kids and husband. Letting work pile up on my desk. At this point, I’ll be here till 8 pm tonight getting caught up. My kids won’t get a proper dinner and I’ll be an even worse mother than I already am.
It’s sick, I tell you. Sick.
Look, I gotta' go. But don’t tell this to anyone, ok? And don't worry. I’ll be all right. I just had to get it off my chest.
posted by TBTAM at Friday, January 06, 2006
I used to love mine too, just like you describe. It *was* sick and I suspected that my loved ones worried about it without fully letting on. I am doing better now. Right now the blog and I are more friends than lovers. I enjoy the blog and it's a good thing to have around, but the mad passion lasted only for a couple of months. Sometimes a few days pass between posts and I don't feel that painful longing I might have during the more intense phase.I do still check the statcounter way more than I should, though.
January 06, 2006
You are right to love your blog. I love your blog, too. :)
January 13, 2006
Difficult Patient said...
Oh well--there are worse things . . .
January 13, 2006
Love the Narcissus analogy. And love your blog!
January 13, 2006
U know,u awakened my feelings towards my blog.I always wondered why do i log in thousands of times a day to check my posts, people's comments, whether my posts r written correctly, no mistakes, ofcourse u know all these sorts of things (although i just created my blog recently and it doesn't have this much of topics)
Anywayzz, u have the full right to fall in love wit ur blog coz i really like it so much. I'm never bored reading it.
January 14, 2006
My Site Counter. What can I say? And let us not forget the TTLB Ecosystem. I am a Maurading Marsupial again!
January 17, 2006
So there it is... I miss you, TBTAM! And I still hope you'll decide to come back.